Frequently Asked Questions
What if a mother comes to the parish Gabriel Project as a “walk-in”?
A mother may come to the parish for assistance without first calling the Gabriel Intake Line or completing the Online Form. She may also be referred from your parish Social Ministry, St. Vincent de Paul conference or other parish organization. Speak with other parish ministries about preferred procedures for Gabriel Project, including information about the services Gabriel Project does (and does not) provide.
If a mother comes to you without calling first, especially where you determine that she lives nearby, it is important to complete a New Client Intake Form with her. If it appears you are not the closest parish, refer her to the Gabriel telephone line or online intake for assistance, so she does not have to travel farther than necessary to obtain help.
After your Gabriel Team completes the Intake Form, forward this form to the Pro-Life Office or to Cathy McConn, the Archdiocesan Gabriel Project Coordinator. This serves two purposes: first, it allows us to accurately track the number of mothers served in a given year and to estimate the future financial and other resource needs at a diocesan level. Second, we have rarely had mothers who sought assistance from multiple parishes concurrently. Keeping track of mothers served by each parish team helps us avoid this duplication and be better stewards of our donated resources.
If a mom contacts the Gabriel Project very early in her pregnancy, can we still help?
We recommend that baby items not be provided to a mother until later in her pregnancy (around 7-8 months), because a parish may receive another mother who reaches out later in her pregnancy and needs available items sooner.
Nonetheless, there are many other services that we can and should offer to a mom early in her pregnancy. For example, she may need referrals for housing, legal services, food and clothing and/or immigration assistance. The Gabriel Project is also able to provide emotional and spiritual support during this time and many mothers develop positive relationships with their Angels from this type of support.
If a mom contacts the Gabriel Project after pregnancy, can we still help?
If a mom comes to the Gabriel Project with a young infant, our teams will be able to assist her. Moms who come to us with infants 3 months or younger are good candidates for Gabriel Project help. These moms can be supported in a similar way to our pregnant moms (e.g., emotional support, material help, parenting questions, referrals to social service agencies).
If a mom has an older infant when she contacts us, it is appropriate to refer her to another ministry, such as the St. Vincent de Paul Society or Catholic Charities’ Blessed Beginnings. Your parish may also have a Walking with Moms in Need team that is assisting families of infants and toddlers.
What if the mother contacting us wants to have an abortion?
On rare occasions, you may be contacted by a mother who is considering abortion or even has an abortion scheduled. Sometimes, the Gabriel Project will be contacted in error because the mother thought we provided these procedures. While abortion access is now limited in Texas, surrounding states still offer the procedure.
In such situations, it is important to remain calm and ask the Holy Spirit to guide you in your conversation with this mother. Above all, it is important to listen to her. Often, she is considering abortion because she feels she has no other options and is very anxious. Ask her about the life circumstances she feels make it impossible for her carry her child to term. Try to offer her options about how she might overcome those circumstances and information about help available. Generally, it is best to focus on her and her concerns about the obstacles she faces rather than on the baby in these discussions. Ask open-ended questions (rather than questions requiring a “yes/no” answer) about how she is feeling.
Many women in this situation feel tremendous pressure to deal with the situation quickly and “get it over with.” It is important that a mother take time to consider this decision carefully. If she has not seen a doctor or obtained an ultrasound, suggest that she visit a pro-life pregnancy help center to obtain more information about her pregnancy and what she can expect. Always feel free to contact the Office of Pro-Life Activities with any questions about this topic. The Houston metro area is blessed to have a number of Pregnancy Help Centers, many of which have ultrasound equipment. Get to know the PHCs in your area in the event a mom needs this service.
What if mom is being pressured to abort?
Sometimes, you may be contacted by a woman whose family or significant other is pressuring her to abort her child. This is common where the mother herself is a minor but also occurs in other circumstances. It is illegal for anyone to “force” or “require” anyone to have an abortion against their will. However, women often feel coerced to abort and many family members may mistakenly believe abortion is the best option for the mother.
There are various ways to handle this situation. Depending on circumstances, it may be appropriate to work with the mother and her family to come to a reconciliation of this situation. Your pastor or other clergy at the parish can be helpful in this regard. Because of the sensitive nature of this situation and the large number of scenarios that may arise, please contact the Office of Pro-Life Activities with any questions or concerns.
What if mom is experiencing homelessness/has no place to stay?
Occasionally, a mother working with the Gabriel Project will come to the parish advising that she has nowhere to stay for the night due to domestic violence, lack of funds or other issues. While this is a rare occurrence, it is very difficult to secure safe, overnight accommodations at local domestic violence or other shelters on short notice.
We recommend that the Gabriel Project team discuss this potential scenario with the Pastor and other parish teams including Social Ministry, St. Vincent de Paul Society or similar groups. The parish may have resources to deal with this situation or your pastor may have a particular way he wishes this situation to be handled. It is a good idea to be prepared with potential solutions before – and in the unlikely event – this situation occurs.
What if a mom doesn’t want to have a relationship with her Angel?
This is a frequent concern of Gabriel Angels and Coordinators. Our volunteers develop positive relationships with many of the women we work with. In many cases, mothers remain in contact with the Gabriel Project for years after the birth of their children. However, many other women are not seeking this type of mentorship and spiritual care.
Some of our mothers have experienced significant trauma and have difficulty trusting that Gabriel volunteers are sincere in wanting to help. That is okay. You are still able to offer your support, even if she is not ready to accept it fully. Provide the help your mom is willing to accept, continue to offer friendship and support, and keep her and her family in prayer.
It is a good idea, when first meeting with a mom, to outline the nature of the Gabriel Project to her. Sometimes women have heard only that the Gabriel Project provides material items and are unaware of the other services we provide. It is good to have these conversations and establish expectations for the relationship from the outset.
How do I handle questions about adoption?
While rare, a mother you work with may be interested in exploring an adoption plan for her child. If a mother would like to consider adoption or you have other questions, we recommend contacting New Life Adoptions, located in Tomball, TX.
Adoption is a legal proceeding that is best handled through a licensed agency, so Gabriel volunteers should avoid offering advice about specifics of adoption processes. If mom is interested in adoption, suggest she ask those questions of a qualified adoption agency.
How should we handle suspicions of abuse, neglect or trafficking?
In most cases, you should do everything possible to maintain the confidentiality of the mother you are working with. An exception arises if you suspect a mother or someone in a minor’s life of abusing or otherwise neglecting that minor. A person having cause to believe that a minor’s physical or mental health or welfare has been adversely affected by abuse or neglect by any person shall immediately make a report. (Texas Family Code §261.101). The same requirement exists if the mother is herself a minor and there is suspicion of her being abused, neglected, or trafficked by other individuals (see Manual on Reporting Abuse, Neglect or Human Trafficking for more specific information). Reports should also be made if a mother is not a minor but is suspected of being a trafficking victim. Click here to learn about how to report abuse.
If abuse is suspected, immediately contact the Texas Department of Family & Protective Services to make a report at 1-800-252-5400, www.txabusehotline.org. If human trafficking is suspected, contact your local police department. Please advise your Pastor as well as the Office of Pro-Life Activities when such reports are made. If you suspect a minor or potential trafficking victim is in immediate danger, contact local law enforcement. Don’t confront the (potential) abuser. Your report of child abuse or neglect is confidential and immune from civil or criminal liability so long as the report is made in good faith.
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